A Cherry I never want to lose.

Since I first started Fulford School back in ye olde summer of '04, there was someone who instantaneously became the biggest pain in the ass ever: Cherry Smith.

Can we get a picture of me and Chez over here please?



Umm... No. Not quite.



Ahh... There we go. Honestly... You can't get the staff these days.

So anyway. This is Cherry, some 4.8 years after we first met. Please note that for about three of those years, we could Not Stop Arguing.

Not even to save our own mothers. No. Arguing came first.

But then, something magical happened. Something so magical I don't even know what it was.

We suddenly had the ability to get on alright. I have no idea how this happened.

And now? We are awesome. Completely and unanimously awesome. So awesome we can't ever come into close contact in case it causes too much awesome. That's how awesome we are.

So imagine the possibilities when Cherry joined Twitter.

Mwahahahaha...

Round 1: Cackling as I watch her try to work out how the hell to use Twitter...

First tweet: "wondering how the hell Twitter works and if I even know anyone on here SAVE ME!!!"

...And then read all her tweets as she tries to find my profile. NICOLE, WHERE IS NICOLE?!

Round 2: Exchange of in-jokes that probably make us look like Communist fuck-buddies.

In regards to our history exams: "Remember the hotness the Lub(b)e caused... And that Stalin was a Communist, not a fairy."

Round 3: ZE GOOD FRENCH CAKE.

(...And other ways to remember what you learned in class.)

Me: "Ja ja le gut FRAAANNNCE CAKE YOU EAT IT LIKE DOG AND SHIT IT OUT AND YOU EEET IT EGEN YOU PEASANT."

Cherry: "You cannot use the French and German language together, it is a crime, have more respect!"

Me: "THE DUTCH DO IT!!! And you'd better believe me and the Dutch have a v. good rapport after my last Amsterdam weekend..."

Round 4: Ya momma's so fat...

Me: "Ya momma so fat... when she walks out in heels she strikes oil! BOOYAH!"

Cherry: "Yo momma's so fat she has her own postcode! Suck on that!"

Me: "Ya momma's so fat I had to take a train and two buses to get on her good side, yo!"

Cherry: "Yo momma's so fat when she jumped off a bridge, she went straight to hell!"

Me: "Ya momma's so fat that when she fell in love she broke it!"

Cherry: "Yo momma's so fat she had to go to SeaWorld to get baptized!"

At which point I gave up and let her win because she probably has a whole Google search engine of Ya Momma jokes at her disposal.

Cherry: "Yay! WW3 has ended!"

Me: "Make sure you tell ya momma..."

Round 5: FINALE - Pulling a Britney.

So today it was widely broadcast that I would be getting my hair cut. Why was this so controversial? Because I never cut my hair. Ever. It was the best part of a metre long. So when I returned home with the second most short hair I've ever had in my life from 3 years onwards, it had to spread around.

No less than three hours later, I threatened to pull a Britney and shave it all off.

Literally TWO SECONDS LATER, Cherry had responded.

Cherry: "Nicole you look gorgeous, I absolutely love your hair, don't do a Britney please you will look ridiculous! You look gorgey, love you!"

Can you not feel the hysteria behind that tweet? The panic?

10 out of big shiny 10 for the single most passionate tweet of the year.

Except in July when someone proposes to their girlfriend over Twitter.

You know it'll happen.

And at this late point I have come to three conclusions:

1. I love Cherry.

2. I use Twitter too much.

3. Pulling a Britney is not cool, kids, not cool.

I rest my case.

Just called to say...

I killed nearly two hours last night on this fantastic site.

That's right. I'm an e-card junkie now.

In the spirit of Christmas or Easter or Lent or whatever I made a few which I'm sure certain people will appreciate.

Matt's already seen his, but he almost failed to appreciate the sheer genius of his card, so I shall post his here so he can be reminded of my awesomeful brain power once over.



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Then, in tribute to what was possibly the best in-lesson moment of all time, I made this for Anna.



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I was on a role. I remembered back to a moment unforgotten in history when Cherry realised that a VERY dim-witted member of our group wrote about entirely the wrong decade.



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It's only natural for me to think of Emma when I see things like this.



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Tilda gave me this invite of the century today (nice cropping work, girls), and I thought of her loopy self and crazy hair with love.



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And then my sister walked past with a toastie in her hands.

It was just meant to be...

RACH!



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Seriously, that site added years onto my life.

I love you baby.

I was just talking away to Cherry on MSN, minding my own business when she said this...

[Apologies for the MSN transcript, I know they are blogging faux pas...]

Chez says:
I will upload a blog in a matter of seconds.
August Rush - Oww fuckety oww says:
Awesome
August Rush - Oww fuckety oww says:
Did you get my copyright notice?
Chez says:
Should be there.
Chez says:
Seeya x

*At this point I go to read Cherry's latest blog post*

August Rush - Oww fuckety oww says:
BITCH!

Look what she's posted.

I need to explain that top picture.

I look like a douche because:

a) It was day four/five of Berlin and I'd had no sleep in that time.
b) I wasn't very engaged because EVERYONE had their cameras out and were snapping away.
c) I was at the top of the Berlin TV tower looking down.

Now, remembering that I have all these FANTASTIC reasons, I would like you to look at this picture.



What's Cherry's excuse here? She took this photo all by herself... I just assisted in the background (note: Me and Joe are like the devils on her shoulders... Cherry has no angels).



I also think that Cherry was very evil to interrupt this potentially beautiful scene. Me and Matt could have been having a TENDER MOMENT for all Cherry knew. (I jest, I jest...)

So TAKE THAT, Cherry!

This is the last time.

I am NEVER letting Cherry borrow my headphones again.

I've just been spectacularly rickrolled.

I- I'm not sure how I feel right now.

Fragile, maybe.